Welcome to to part 4 of this special Report on Overcoming the fear of public speaking.
Public speaking is a common source of stress for most people.
So how do we overcome this irrational fear?
In part 4 of this series on overcoming the fear of public speaking Fact: - Public speaking is a common source of stress for most people.
So how do we overcome this irrational fear?
In this section you will learn how nothing bad ever happens to speakers and how you can easily handle any comments from your audience
One thing that adds to the fear of public speaking is the dread people have that something awful, terrible, or publicly humiliating will happen to them.
What if I pass out from nervous exhaustion? What if I forget everything I intended to say and am left standing there, totally speechless? What if the audience hates me and begins throwing things at me?
What if they all get up and leave after the first ten minutes? What if they snipe at me with harsh questions or comments once I'm done? What if someone in the audience tries to turn the group against me?
Even when they do, it's useful to have a strategy in mind that has them turn out perfect. Sound difficult? It's not really.
These could be embarrassing if they occurred. Fortunately, most of them don't happen. This is an irrational fear of failure, and believe me you won’t fail.
I've found that most of the "negative" things that happen when I'm speaking can be handled by keeping this one simple, but powerful, principle in mind:
everything that happens can be used to my advantage.
If people get up and start to head for the door, I can stop what I'm doing and ask for feedback. Was there something about my topic, my style, or my manner of presentation that was offensive to them? Were they simply in the wrong room at the start and didn't know it? Did someone misinform them about the presentation topic?
No matter what they tell me, by stopping to deal with this situation, honestly and humbly, will often score points with my remaining audience. It also will give me the opportunity to learn how I am affecting people, so I can make any corrections that might be needed.
Even if everyone walked out and refused to give me a reason, I could ultimately find ways to benefit from this experience. At the very least, I could use it as the opening for my next presentation. "You know, I gave this same presentation the other day and everyone in the audience walked out in the first ten minutes. That's my current record, so I guess we'll just have to see what happens today."
The same principle is used for dealing with hecklers or people who ask harsh questions. If you assume that nothing truly bad can ever happen when you're speaking, you'll be amazed how well you can relate to such events and how often you can indeed use them to your advantage.
And once you've successfully used this principle many times, your anxiety about public speaking will have almost disappeared. You'll know it will be virtually impossible for anything "bad" to happen to you, And you will be armed with the knowledge you’ll be able to handle whatever comes your way. That is a very comforting thought.
To succeed as a public speaker, you don't have to control the behaviour of your audience. There are certain things you do need to control--your own thoughts, your preparation, arrangements for audio-visual aids, how the room is laid out--but one thing you don't have to control is your audience. They will do whatever they do, and whatever they do will usually be "perfect."
If people are fidgety or restless, don't try to control this. If someone is talking to a neighbour, or reading the newspaper, or falling asleep, leave them alone. If people look like they aren't paying attention, refrain from chastising them. Unless someone is being intentionally disruptive, there is very little you need to control.
Thinking you need to change or control other people is a hidden cause of stress in many areas of life. This is just as true for relating to a group as it is for relating to your friends, spouse, children, or other acquaintances.
The fifth and final part of this series on Overcoming the fear of public speaking will be published in the next day or two. So check back for the last part of this report on overcoming the fear of public speaking. You can get this sent to your RSS reader by subscribing to this blog.
Paul Johnstone is a Speaker, Trainer and Paradigm Shaker. Founder of The Paradigm Shakers and a Subject Matter Expert.
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©Paul Johnstone
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